I can hear the grilled cheese talking to me. "Let me in there!" they wanna get inside me
i just pissed myself at work. maybe they'll buy the old coffee spill trick
her facebook's as public as her vagina
when I sang my humps to you I meant it.
She took a picture of me when she thought I was sleeping. I don't know whether to be amused or scared.
Someone in a vagina costume on campus.
All I know is that either you or I told a black guy that he looked like usher and he was sexy and that is our confession
I think I saw maybe 3 ugly girls the entire time we were there
Yea its like that frat house was built to keep fat chicks out of parties
Look. I've got things to do today.. Will you hurry up and come over so I can give you some head and get my day started already
Outside
When Pony by ginuwine plays I pretty much just grind on the nearest penis.
I knew no one else would have gone along with it since it's morally wrong and probably illegal. You said, "Yes. And let's add fireworks."
He called us the '3 Amigos' and told us if hos ex wife came we had to jump the porch railing and hide in the bushes.
Although the guy I'm messing around with just offered to let me be his rich brother's sugar baby
i just remember singing the theme song from 2 and 1/2 men to my hair
In hindsight I shouldn't have been blasting Antichrist Superstar if I didn't want to seem suspicious driving up to a Catholic church
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