Nice. Sry i missed. Also sorry that i pissed on my toothbrush last nite
Sink seemed easy target but balance was no good
the semester is winding down: time to procrastinate by googling cheap keg options
So how do we make 4/20 better than every other day we are stoned?
You are two creepy Justin Bieber quotes away from me not talking to you for the rest of the day
If I had a pelvic thrust emoticon, I would use it
i dont understand why you dont get why i love him. i opened the bathroom door and he had his penis in his right hand and a mcdouble in his left.
Apparently the last thing they remember of me was me stumbing into a bathroom, then falling out 5 minutes later clutching a butter knife repeating "ketamine goes in my face hole"
Well he told me I'd never be a wizard, and so I responded with you'll never have a big penis. After that we both just sat there and cried.
So after I was tied with a feather boa he left me there with KFC and cherry coke
You tripped over nothing.. everyone stopped what they were doing and stared..you stood up and yelled "you win this time gravity"..then started chugging someone's drink
Please put me on a plane and hypontize me into forgetting the little bit of last night that I do remember.
He called his dick the "gentle giant"
Just remember, it's never too late to make a porno
I'm still not 100% sure who I'm sleeping with
I have tasted many bathrooms
& I came downstairs to find my whole family discussing the fact that I have a vibrator, which my mom found accidentally....
Randomize
