Why do girls always cry at the bar?
What's the point of going out if you're going to cry all night?
Are they having an exestensial crisis at the bar?
Do you think they'll have a special part during the BET awards for Michael Jackson even though he turned white?
I would have added her but her profile pic was piece of pie
the cops didn't wanna shut the tailgate down but the strippers weren't allowed to take money without a license or somthing
How did I end up in the pool?!
Welcome to ASU
His wife found out about our affair the same day he got fired for it.
We split an eighth of shrooms and went ice fishing. It didn't get weird until I caught one and we both started crying.
Hold on - sidebar. My best friend just threw a 40 pack of condoms through my window.
Well, I'm hung over and my penis hurts - two signs of success
He wants to tie me naked and spread out on his table, press a vibrator to my clit and feed me ice cream.
That is my stoner wet dream!
He called my boobs fluffy. Part sexy part pilsbury dough boy. Part sexy pilsbury dough boy. I'm so confused. And flattered?
This town is a penis wasteland. I haven't seen a suitable penis in months. This is becoming an emergency situation. I need penis in my life
I'm dying of laughter, but I'm also just dying
Send help
I'm eating a bagel on the toilet and watching porn. Trust me, I've got my priorities straight.
Turns out naked yoga wasn't a pickup line. I feel betrayed.
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