I wish I could drop acid with the muppets
Her bacne/racne was so bad it was like having sex with bubble wrap.
During the middle of giving him head, he flashes his phone and says "I like to watch."
There was a guy running for some position in our government named "young boozer" hell yes I voted for him
The best part is that he made someone stop their workout to take pictures of him, specifically so he could put them on facebook. That is an unparalleled level of douchebaggery.
You always know it is going to end badly when a guy asks if he met you at a "coed naked lawn bowling party"
I made out with him with my retainers in. My drunken hook-ups get lazier and lazier.
someone who i have in my phone as thundercock just said he was DTF
No im the worst roommate ever. Just dump a bucket of water on my head at 8am so i can suffer like i deserve to.
Im going to be coked out with hello kitty fire arms. Valentines day can suck my dick
I left myself a note saying 'buy a hamster but not an orange one like this pen'
omg so drunk
I found out his moms name, maiden name, profession, and office location, his dads name and profession, his home phone, picture of their house, all of his work profiles, and the cost of their house. All I'm trying to do is find his damn twitter
Only my second night back in town and I already have drunk middle aged women doing the robot around me in a circle.
Metaphysical thesis on the illusion of self+ 2 day adderal binge = the walls of reality are crumbling
just creeped your profile pictures and you should feel satisfied in knowing that you had great eyebrows even before people started drawing them on
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