a/c is broke at work...just took my panties off at my desk and the janitor saw it...might have a date for later. let you know
Well the bottom line is that I had to completely coat my testicles in Neosporin.
why didn't we just drop out of school years ago and become dominatrix bitches who beat men?
I don't know but we should still do that
why isn't there a fb relationship option that says 'still banging my ex'
You suck. You're fired. I need to find a less reasonable voice-of-reason.
Just did ten shots in 8.34 minutes........ Slowly getting over the loss
Im tired as fuck but i cant leave him here like this i gave him the acid and i feel the responsibillity to put his mind back together its fun im an architect about to about to construct a whole new belief and moral system inside this soul. Talk about the best psychothearpy
You brought us all personal gifts you had stolen from the party and bellowed "hoes hoes hoes, clepto Santa loves you"
I try new drugs instead of new boys. That way you can't scold me about the importance of condoms
If they were bad they leave that night, if they were good they get a gold star, and if they were great they get invited back. Simple.
Agree to hang out with him and then take a gigantic shit right on him. Or if youve forgiven him for being a fucker maybe make out with him.
I just saw the co founder of Waffle House passed away Friday. Are you okay?
That's about the same time my life started falling apart... Coincidence?!?!? I think NOT!!!
wait i saw you last night?
we found you ass naked on the couch covered in pillows.
Word. I want it involving like... sing-a-longs and sniffing glue.
I'll get the most aesthetic strap on, you'll see
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