so... how was it???
he had bart simpson sheets. he had itunes on shuffle and "don't worry be happy" started playing when he took his boxers off. sad to say i was neither worried nor happy
Well, it's 24 hours till finals. I need high A's on all of them and I still am not sure where exactly on campus most of my classes took place.
That shit is worth it...they got medicine for that now a days
its simple. when his lips are on my clitoris i want to marry him. when they are speaking i want to kill him.
I'm at work, still drunk. Can you turn on the radio? If the station goes off the air I passed out. Can't get fired. Haven't slept yet.
She vajazzled her vag. It was as useless as putting earrings on chewbacca
You know summer is almost over when ur school booty calls start hitting u up as if solidifying their spot in drunken mistakes for next semester
Dude, they are shaking the RV, yell at them. It feels like i'm being rocked to sleep, I don't like it, I'm not a baby.
So hungover. I'm getting too old for trolloping around in disco shorts going shot for shot with well behaved underclassmen in an effort to lure them to the dark side of alcoholism and liver failure.
Now I'm obligated to stay and cuddle with her because the condom broke. Fuck.
WHY IS FOOD SO DELICIOUS
BECAUSE SCIENCE
Ps we ordered a pizza at the pool today and I dropped the entire thing in the pool. We still ate it. #canthang
If Plan B had a rewards card I would have earned so many free tote bags by now
I've had more sex since the twins moved in than I'd had in the previous four years. They are the best wingman ever.
There's something sensual about taking off a pair of socks.
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