Happy Easter!!!
I'm an idiot
yep. he's not circumcised. how did it take me six months to realize THAT?
I think my vagina is haunted
I told her at least we still had each other. That's when she started crying.
NEWS FLASH: A bottle of wine can fit into a taco bell cup.
I think we can all look back on last night and categorize it under, " reason why Cory can't be left at the bar by himself"
No big deal, we were just two friends having sex. It's perfectly normal we don't remember. Water under the sex bridge,
He turned down jacuzzi sex. He cares more about my vagina than i do.
I cried and ate like 6 tacos in the taco bell parking lot at almost midnight, sober, alone, listening to a demi lavato cd. And that was the good part.
Do what? I was just saying that at some point there's a chance I'll have a boner. Think of it like a guessing game. "Does he have one now?"
Hootey the Owl eats a mean pussy.
Um, OK. WTF?
The guy from the Halloween party. We finally hooked up. Went down in me for 45 mins. Came 4 times.
I have the most nasty and explicit wet dreams of my boss that I'm embarrassed to look him in the face. I'd be pregnant or promoted if he only knew
Is talking to an iron man poster a good or bad indicator that you've been drinking too much?
her idea of a romantic time is a bottle of jager, some Guacamole and chips.
can't go wrong with guac.
she passed out standing next to the car. her head hit the door so hard the alarm went off. she instantly snapped out of it and started sprinting away
Randomize
