I'm gunna smoke cigs today. I feel like I'm in that powerful and gritty mood which requires them
So im at the gym and some guy has a tattoo of a hand doing the shocker... The douche bag bar has been raised yet again.
She found 60 bucks at the strip club. Its probabably been in a vagina but really most money probably has
do you think she knows her nickname is brickface?
I would compare it to a jeffrey but in smoothie form. More drugs in here than Bobby Brown's sock drawer.
and after i failed the breathalyzer i said to the cop "i've never been very good at tests"....
After we were finished she said "That was like marriage sex". Should I take that as a compliment or insult?
I guess, all I remember was giving you road head the whole way there so you wouldn't fall asleep.
If I could drive and get you Starbucks I would... But that's probably not a good idea. On account of the drugs.
Idk man, most things I eat are even better than I expected. Like when I drunkenly put mac and cheese on a slice of cheese pizza or when I soberly put mac and cheese into a Taco Bell burrito.
We took her out for fresh air and next thing we knew, she was stumbling around the backyard picking dead leaves up off the ground and putting them in her shirt to "save them".
I'm glad your nude photos turned out "classy" but you cannot hang them in the living room.
But of course I'm in. After all, what fun would the holidays be without trying to find the perfect gift to impress someone you've never met, but need the approval of??
If this gives you any indication of my current state, I stopped at Meijer after work and bought funyuns, pregnancy tests and chocolate.
I am listening to Jack Johnson and wearing the sweater your Mother made me fuck mother nature I am in my happy place right now
Randomize
