seagrams + popov + pineapple + milk. there, ur search for worlds worst drink is over. you're welcome
sometimes i wish i could find another girl that loves my dick as much as she does
i feel like she has dreams of it being like a person saying hey lets go play
She was singing my heart will go on into her barf bag. celine aint got shit on her.
He just kept yelling woof and then threw money all over me...
he prob just wants to be friends and here i am photoshopping our kids
You tried to tell her that the salad was an afrodisiac then proceeded to stroke yourself with the feather duster
If it's any consolation, your boobs looked awesome.
I said "have a good day officer and I'll see you friday when I get arrested for being too drunk.."
She swung at the pinata with crutches
Dude the tree smoked with me. I planted the roach with it and smiled.
S.O.S. he's talking about horses and breast feeding.
I just got carded by a ten year old.
Yeah, if you don't like strip clubs you won't like microwave chimichangas.
They had like literally all the dildos. It looked like a seance for dick. I left the apartment and haven't been back.
i still cant feel my toes or walk straight...its been 2 days.
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