is it really weird I just got "suckable tits" in my honesty box and I'm flattered??
i just hope all the shady shit stops so i can let him into my pants
I found your dream girl. She looked 11 but drove and on her key chain it said "if i am not wasted the day is"
turns out Discover card thinks that if you spend $450 at four different liquor stores in one evening that the card "must have been stolen"
I think I'd rather ejaculate tabasco. You'd have to scrape out guacamole.
im sitting in my room wearing my power rangers shirt watching a movie about a magical dragon. Ive totally forgotten what having a sex life is like.
yeah you're probably right.. i should stop equating love with getting naked on a webcam for him.
do you know how hard it is to bring up the "what do I do if you conk out while we're fucking" conversation while maintaining the dignity of.the narcaleptic girl you just met?
I don't know how we managed to stay up but we actually sat in front of her open refrigerator for god knows how long while she ate salami straight out of the package with her fingers and I laughed. It was a trainwreck.
I found a hair colour I want in a porn.
He totally fucked me in his Chewbacca socks
I can tell that I'm high when listening to celine dion becomes such a life changing experience
fuck st louis. fuck their hockey. fuck their basball. fuck their football if they still got it. fuck their tiddlywinks teamm. fuck their ribs. fuck their entire city. what im trying to say is i dont like st louis
It's so obvious he's evil. I mean, would a non-evil person have facial hair like that?
Dude... this pee is not alleged
YOU SAT ON MY LAP!
Wuddup pee lap
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