Who tried to make mustard cubes with the ice cube tray?
what if every blade of grass was a penis?
After we finished he asked if I knew if it was a boy or girl. Diet. Starts. Now.
I thought about farting is his face when he was going down on me last nite.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
two gay guys came in and bought just a kite and a box of wine. Why cant I have saturday nights that awesome
Just ran four miles to popeye's. And back. Dedication.
Way to high for badminton right now. This is gonna be a shitshow.
and i'm going to kill you for what you did to my nipples last night. of course i want to hang out
I've slept in a different bed every day this week. Operation Ho Ho Ho is a success!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This chick had a microhand. Fucking, like, jerking off a baby carrot would make it look like corn.
It's gonna be ok. As we grow older we sometimes lose sight of what's important to us. Like safe sex. And standards.
I'm not drinking with you for AT LEAST a day
I don't want to jinx anything but I may have found the one.
Cat or human?
Human
He must've been a bear in a previous life. My nipple is bleeding. Shit's sensitive.
He left weed in my bong for me this morning. What a guy.
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