They use the phrase "final warning" so often the words have lost all meaning.
Looks like an M-80 went off in a lb. of pastrami
Dude you can sell sperm for 100 to 250 bucks a time. And the best part is there will be kids all over the world that will have me as a daddy. It's like I'm jerking off my way into ruling the world
That's why she's the girl with her life together and you're the girl with the penis drawn on your car.
Why is the garage door in the middle of the street?
I just need to know if he's either really genuine about being in my life or being in my vagina.
well apperantly i passed out on the stairs shouting "victory".
I'm Still in a robe trying to piece together 3-7am I'll be there in a few
if you just come over, i will entertain you
arguing about the color of your bong does not count as entertainment
FACE TIME HER WHILE YOU GUYS BANG
I just heard your voicemail. Glad you like my dick and think I'm cool
The bump on my forehead, i think, was from falling asleep at front door, on my knees, slumped over. But we played good music so what?
The only reason I have clothes in my overnight bag is to cover up my sex toys.
I really need to curb my attractions to blondes with tattoo sleeves, firearms and alcoholism
sorry for showing your butt to the bar
sorry for licking your cheek
Randomize
