Right on... I dropped my chapstick
I blacked out
she's not even a shacker, she never made it inside. she's just a porch girl
I cant watch the real world now after jersey shore. its like trying to go back to vagina once uve had anal
Bad news. I lost my teeth. Good news. I can still take a guy home sans teeth.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Im down. Even tho your nick name intimidates my vagina.
how are you shocked you fucked her? sure shes hot, but she also washed your beerpong balls in her mouth..... you should probably get tested.
Friends don't let friends drunk sleep in the dorm common room
That's not a funny feeling. That's hepatitis. You got it from that bar where everything was sticky.
Abort mission; I repeat: Abort mission.I found an attractive one.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You told us that you were going to become a 'new man' and threw your tv set out of a window.
I got to my internship late... with a bag of chipotle and sex hair.
My mom just looked at me and said; "You've been pretty bitchy lately do you need some dick?" WTF has happened to me?
he's smothering me... and not in the good, can you move your thigh off my face please?.. way
I got pull-out-my-nuvaring-drunk last night.
If I ever say "I'm never drinking again" just hand me a bottle of jack. I'll snap out of it.
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