you miss my big massive throbbing cock dont you?
Woah.
that's not how you spell hell yes.
I was just standing there and then BOOM! She was attacking my face with her mouth.
I don't get it, man. She treated me like a sexual predator but treated you like a piece of meat.
Girl just texted me a pic of her boobs with the caption "don't think I'm a whore"
i can't believe i had a foursome before a threesome
I just got my inseam measured in raffle tickets by a drag queen. Being fondled for charity is awesome.
Its a Guy he gets weed for. I'm kinda confused as to why there are going to even be tuxedos involved at all.
i was just offered a 40 day sex challenge. prepare for the best 40 days of your life.
oh. my. god. yes.
there's a guy pushing a keg up the street in a shopping cart. you have to love graduation
true friends will drive 3 hours to come smoke a couple blunts with you on the bridge where your car broke down
How dare you question the sanctity of Chocolate-and-Porn day
I just fucked her in the corner of an ally while holding a large pizza waiting on a pledge for a ride.
My glasses were in the garbage this morning
then you dropped a clam in a draught beer like it was a drop shot and and started chugging as beer spewed all over your body.
It's one am and you're asking me if you should buy a plane ticket for a booty call.
She was giving me head, and a cop pulled up next to us. I freaked when he looked over at me, but so did he and rear ended the car in front of him.
Randomize
