i think i may have caused an international incident at the french embassy, just fyi
hahaha how?
its a long story involving a horse trailer and some shrubbery
My mom is wearing Ed Hardy. There aren't words.
you said you get the best orgasms off Pez dispensers. how do you think he felt????
I woke up to a paper award certificate for best blow job and he was gone. You're welcome mystey man.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'll give her a pass for the first one, but after the second threesome, she should have learned her lesson.
Good, she had spurs on her boots. That is a sign for instant herp attack.
Just getting in the shower.... found a "great job" sticker stuck to my boob.
So how was your night?
Brightest idea yet: lets drink enough at ladies-drink-free nights to make up for the cost of tampons. Breaking even on having vaginas!
Don't need my thirties to be known as the decade of "new types of shits from drinking" like last night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
All I have are vague memories of us eating ham?
Sorry I told all the other bridesmaids you were an asshole. I had had a few drinks and it's how I felt at the time.
Is there a single word to describe 'the last guy she slept with before meeting her husband'? Cause there should be.
so then the cop took one last hit off our blunt and then drove off in his car and we just all stood there thinking, yea... that just happened...
rowboat hit a rock. taking on water. going down fast. bring cheerios.
aye aye capn
Girl behind me in line at CVS was getting impatient then outta nowhere blew up shouting that if she didn't get her plan B soon she might be a mom and that if we couldn't tell she'd be a horrible mom
Randomize