Who goes to Church hungover
Those who weren't lucky enough to go still drunk
I'm reading about reasons for wearing clothing. IS THIS COLLEGE OR PRESCHOOL?
you called me at 4 am to tell me you found the cracker barrel location where we'll have lunch next week
im giving 12 year olds life advice. this is probably illegal somewhere.
How did you get the entire couch up on it's side and into the bathroom?
I would just watch. I wouldn't even have a boner cuz I would do so much coke. It would just be funny.
Can we end it on a good note at least? Can we fuck and then never talk again?
Nope she woke up in a hotel room alone on 55th street. A guy in a lamborgini gave her a ride this morning. She was walking barefoot home
I told him he was probably the first guy to get fucked while wearing Star Wars pyjamas.
There still is not and there never will be anything as magical as getting high while listening to William Shatner's version of Bohemian Rhapsody.
I just sent a snapchat of my boobs for Adderall. It's finals season.
I'd say it's his fault for never running us through proper protocol for "catching your RA in the middle of him banging some girl"
I'm honored that you could tear yourself away from your girlfriend's vagina long enough to text me.
What happened last night? I'm too scared to get out of bed and see the destruction.
First of all, check to see if that naked guy is still alive. He didn't look to be breathing when I left
I feel like with a dick like that he could of done more with it
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