ha so i just found a picture of you eating paper towels and many of Laura freaking out from it.
It smells like wine and fried chicken. Im confused and intrigued.
ironically, his detergent was also "small and mighty"
the owner gave me a free bottle of vodka and a 12pack of red bull if i agreed to leave. my drunken antics are finally paying off.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My roommate's all sad and is crying and the chick I want to bang is in the room and Nic Cage is on fire. What the fuck.
Between my vibrator and my iPhone carpal tunnel is inevitable.
my drunken justification for peeing in her closet was that her shoes were ugly
wait, how does the 20 year old one night stand pregnant girl have a superiority complex?
I feel like when purchasing hard liquor on a Monday I also need to buy a happy 21st bday card to not seem so pathetic
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think I'm destined to be the stoner version of one of those successful but emotionally unavailable characters Sandra Bullock always plays in movies
Well, if it makes you feel any better I'll be drinking tequila and doing lines on Halloween. Just like old days.
Didn't know where your dishes went. Put em in the bathtub. They're stacked taller than you. It's like modern art.
Yeah bc that's when u should take a Molly. At a house party with everyone from ur hometown
Knowing there are different types of spiders in different countries and regions makes me never want to travel.
My roommate has a sixth sense about my jerking off and walks in EVERY. SINGLE. TIME.
Randomize