Kenny Powers is just a normal guy with exceptional hair
I've been emailing with a woman. I don't think she's into me, but we've become sorta email buddies. I'm hoping to meet her because on her profile she states she's into 'fisting.' Frankly the thought kinda freaks me out but I'm dying to see what kind of woman is 1) into that and 2) admits it upfront.
You threw up. And every time you flushed you would wave and go "Bye Bye!" and then when the new water came you would greet it with "Helloooo!"
I didn't cheat on him. Cheating means finding out. I made sure he was at work first. After the guy left I got shitfaced just so nothing seemed out of the ordinary when he came home.
Anyone who says sunshine brings happyness has never woken up with the worst hangover of their life to their window being open and it being a bright shinny day
she asked if i had a condom...i said yes...when we finished it wasnt on...told her it was at home on my dresser.
Bagel with cream cheese. It's blowing my fucking mind.
How high are you right now..
I MICROWAVED IT. SIGNIFICANT IMPROVEMENT.
oh my god. were standing in the kitchen and were chanting "EYEBROWS" and shaving peoples eyebrows. I have work tomorrow and want to keep my eyebrows.
You're dick is like the main character. It needs its own picture.
We popped the air mattress last night via sex and we just kept going but it feels like I have a bruise on every vertebrae
I used the phrase "love child of quasimodo and cyclops " in a sentence today.
Someone called asking about the gate code and I said "hashtag" for # instead of "pound." Ugh. I feel so dirty.
We should get drunk in walmart
when?
20 minutes ago
There way too many people in that club who have had their dick in me
Ps can u get with my cousin? He's a freshman at uconn and he's very attractive but like were related....
Randomize