Dude, I just had an awesome rave/orgy with like bunch of hot Asian chicks on a cable car. It was like being in a Gwen Stefani video, cept w/o the bad spelling
God, I love San Francisco.
There is a reason Crest White Strips don't list masturbation as one of the myriad of activities to do while whitening your teeth. A very good reason.
No better way to find a friend than to offer cyber sex and see what happens
The walk of shame is far, far worse on crutches.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Every time a song comes on I get sad if glee has not a cover of it
I'm ready for this little girl to leave so I can hit the bong already
I'm either watching Fifth Element or Hotel Rwanda. There's black people and white people and high life tall boy 18 packs are $11.99 so I could be watching my own hand. I have no idea.
That was around the time you tried to kick me out for being rude to your fish.
Just looked in the mirror and i look like ive been gang banged. Im so proud of my boyfriend it almost hurts
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Also, last night I had a dream that I was in a victoria's secret fashion show and they made me wear a t-shirt over my lingerie. Spring dieting begins now.
Omg this is like trying to sleep on a pile of ballsacks.
Everytime I try to keep track of the amount of people I slept with I always forget about that guy I met on the dc metro, where I woke up to him organizing his Special K and Molly and I was covered in sleeping cats.
I'm taking the day off so I can get drunk at Whole Foods before noon
I ended up changing her contact in my phone to "O Great Potato".
Totally just got spotted hitting the bowl by someone else hitting a bowl. We gave each other a head nod
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