Apparently at one point I was wearing my sweatshirt backwards like it was normal and then I threw up into the hood. Never drinking again.
You remember correctly you did get a golf cart ride out but it wasnt because you were special. You were so smashed you were screaming tiger at random golfers in the middle of there backswing.
great, thanks for announcing that I gave you head over twitter
at least I said it was good
My cha cha got a haircut
thank god. going down on you was like chewing on astroturf
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
when a girl feels in her heart, the way she feels in her vagina, anything is possible.
If this herpes test comes back negative I'm asking out the doctor.
It's alright she couldn't hear you. Her legs were over her ears
I think their strategy was based on people bein at a beach, seein a rainbow, and havin an orgasm at the same time.
Please tell me why there is some girl tied to our toilet?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Serious questions. Who is that girl? Why is she wearing a tiara? And why does she keep asking about penis piercings?
My puffy vagina and I are on the way to the doctor to see what your mutant penis did to us THANKS A LOT
I'm spending tomorrow with her. What should my ridiculous personal goal be? I've already got a blowjob while eating a cupcake
WHEN THE FUCK DID MCDONALD'S DECIDE TO QUIT SERVING BURGERS AT 1:00AM?
I would peed on everything
Get up, biotch, before I come traipsing in there to rip apart whatever god-forsaken spoon you have going on between the two of you and your dog.
i found you in bed eating fish fillets dipped in chocolate pudding
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