Are we in a gay sports bar?
I have a very awkward question for you. Could you possibly take my black dildo. My mom wants to clean my room.
I love how all the girls on the plan b commercial wake up alone.. Like me
The dutch village is so much worse hungover. Fuck them and their wooden shoes.
girls just need to accept the fact that i'm going to make out with their boyfriends
sex on the roof is not as easy as it sounds
It's only 11:30 and she's already making friends with the homeless...
She wants to practice her harmonica skills on my penis
I woke up with a half eaten bag of lettuce in my hand, wearing my Halloween costume from last year. Damn you tequila.
When you're awkward as a teenager, it never goes away. You just mask it. With makeup. And boobs.
Just so you know the unusual amount of skittles on your floor is entirely your own fault. You bought me 20 bags of them while I was high.
I'm not finished with being a sloppy white girl alcoholic. I didn't postpone having a husband and kids for sober weekends.
Costco cheesecake and whisky. A night made in heaven
I knew it was all downhill from there when the straight vodka I was drinking tasted like water.
I woke up next to a Big Mac box.. And had no sheets or clothes on. The night was a success I think.
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