Thats the last time I go out drinking with my Irish friends. Two shots of flaming sambucca = bar on fire. I was only trying to high five the barman.
I can only name 15 people I've had sex with - can I just start claiming that as my sex number?
So i just got guilted into doing a tequila shot by a group of guys chanting "USA!" at me.
Ice cream after masturbating>masturbating any other time
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I honestly can't remember your justification for putting peanut butter on your cell phone.
"DO YOU LIKE FLYING KITES" WORKED AS A PICKUP LINE. SUCK IT.
You were drink-wine-from-the-bottle drunk trying to take everybody's blood pressures again.
Nahh no judgin. Compliments to the balls are always heartfelt
I just made my dating life into my own game show. would you like to meet the contestants? (photos not included)
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
like, there should be nothing wrong with me wanting to watch you put on a bikini and roll around in a kiddie pool of jello
I'm setting goals and achieving them. I'd say I'm quite mature for my age.
You're goal was to fuck him and you don't even remember it.
So if you wanna come get your pants you can. But you have to come in your boxers. Rules are rules!
Definitely didn't just make out with a guy the same height as me just because we wanted to see what it would be like to not have to reach up....
Im riding the bus with beer in one hand and chapagne in the other. I love weddings.
On a scale of having tea with Ghandi to the apocalypse how bad of an idea is it to drink with a 100 degree fever?
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