no i did not stop my best friend from eating out my sister...bros before hoes
I know I know. I considered playing it sober but after I typed out IS SHE A GENIE? I knew it was impossible to hide.
I'm flagged. Drank strippers water. Flashed Dave tryin to get a job here. You order the shots. Green tea betch.
still using moms red Christmas cookie plate she sent to cut lines on. not sure I can return with a clear conscious
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
im destined to be single forever. i hope its okay if your kids come and hang out with my cats.
If I get to the point of singing Man of Constant Sorrow then please god let me do it, record it, then cut me off.
I drew a giraffe.. But she did say that bumped that test up from a 39 to a 40. It's the little things.
Update: I may or may not be in a cult
Update #2: I may or may not be the leader of said cult
Well, I washed his beard with dish soap and then I fucked him three times.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I know of an excellent nanny. A lot like Mary Poppins but way cooler. And likes pot.
It was only in the sobering silence of the wilderness on the mountain, after I was too tired to talk anymore and I also didn't want to tell Julian that we were lost, that I realized how super tripped out I had been the entire time...
I'm far too poor to be letting my hookups wear my shirts home. I'm down to about a total of 8 shirts and have no intention of buying more
I mean it could have been worse, I could have been sober.
I'm not sure you count what happened last night as sex.
Thinking and hoping ice cream is the answer to my problems
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