I wanna eat
then eat your cupcake
does he have a tent? the camping kind not the boner kind.
I'm going to get a baby outfit made and send it to her that says: "My husband fucked his subordinate and all I got was another baby".
Is it a problem that I find my wife's 16 year old niece sexy?
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Nothing ruins a good sext like too many emoticons
How fortunate humanity is that it need not rely on the female orgasm for procreation
It starts with an S and ends with arah just gave me a bj.
Your expertise in crazy bitches is needed.
You were like pukeahontas last night, you tried to tell us you were okay, then you puked in the garden.
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at which point he tried to give himself a prince albert piercing with the stapler on his desk.
You kept yelling "wood grain wheel" and grinding on fat chicks.
The hell is wrong with me
I sent "Rawrrrr" to 151 matches on Tinder. I feel like thats a substantial size of the DC female population.
How many other adults do you think have slept naked under the Winnie the Pooh blanket sober?
You also spilled beer on my dog and tried to wipe it off with a paper towel but he kept getting away from you.
I may be a feminist, but I am not above using my body to distract you if it means I might beat you in a game of scrabble.