The maid of honor just puked.
I thought if I stared at him long enough he'd walk me to my car. but he didn't. he dddidn't. i rreally thought i had those powers.
He keeps apologizing for not being able to get hard when he's drunk. We havent even left the club yet.
Instead of a promise ring i got my clit peirced, its a promise that ill always give you ass! =]
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This last weekend single handedly took me off the liver transplant list
all they had in the fridge was rum and filled water balloons
I used to practice getting hit by cars.
i cant do it anymore.. every time this girl orgasms she sounds like a motorcycle
That little tingle vodka gives me in my esphagus is what lets me know I'm still alive.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I swear to god if you eat that last piece of pie while I'm gone I will never speak to you again. I'm so serious.
I think pants incapable of making pants work
Is it appropriate to send an apology gift to his roommates for breaking the bathroom sink during crazy sex?
We almost drove away from the bar with a British stranger in our trunk...
I was not drunk. There was Star Wars, sex, and baby oil.
she wouldnt leave because they were playing One Direction. I'm dating a thirteen year old.
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