You keep asking me questions like I have this magical thing called a memory
she's got that wholesome 16 and pregnant look.
i was the DD for the swedish students tonight. Got paid 23 dollars for driving 10 miles. gotta love ignorance and the confusion conversion brings.
just got super drunk mixing jägermeister with my lyme disease meds. even if my face goes paralyzed, at least i got smashed from it.
So currently I have a block of cheese duct taped to my air conditioner in lieu of a fridge.
I like the one of me you and her but you're looking at me...Total foreshadowing right there. I'm cropping it
I've never felt so inclined to grow a dick. THIS is what the gays in this town have done to me
I'm pretty sure last night was the first time I've seen someone drink beer-soaked paper towels. Ever.
i figure now that we're number one party school im obligated to black out at least 4 days a week. andddd go.
Tell me about it. Running across highways take alot outta ya. When he found out, he was all "concerned" about it.
Last night's dream consisted of you, me, a sauce pan full of cocaine and light sabers. I almost cried when I woke up.
We should just do therapy together, clearly we have all the same issues. It's why we are friends.
I snapchatted him nudes and he didn't screenshot a single one of them because he's a gentleman.
My throw up tasted like pumpkin, fall is right around the corner.
And then there was cum in my hair and he was making beans.
Randomize
