so i did it. i barked while i was ejaculating. not a word was said by either of us afterwards.
so how much did i say i owed you?
$5 and a new fuck buddy.
umm..so Dad's wearing a thong, I don't know what to do
put a dollar in it?
woke up rolled in a yoga mat listening to enya. I'm never going back to Oregon ever again.
is this the sara with the beer cane?
you came home soaking wet, and when I asked where your umbrella was, you pulled it out of your bag and were so proud you kept it dry.
she gave me one of those friendship bracelets and said as long as I wore it it was like an all-access pass to her vagina
He Dutch ovened me while I was hiding under the covers from his mom. Needless to say it did not end well.
i feel sensations at the ends of my beard. Either I am super high. Or my face has accepted my beard and I completed my transformation to Mecca
It's decided. Tomorrow I'm getting a Big Mac and a Dildo
I would wear his ballsack as a hat if he asked me to
I'm recovering from the blowjob...She's doing her taxes...
So this is how i'm celebrating Easter? By eating chicken nuggets and masturbating all day. What a life.
Thanks for being my best friend so I can use you as an alibi to my family while I'm out getting some dick in my face.
he was really really nice, and I did coke off of his dong that night too
He just kept repeating "It was like meep meep meep on my balls."
Randomize
