Dude why does my asshole itch so bad?
I'll teach you how to wipe better
I woke up wearing nothing but 7 partially eaten candy necklaces. Only one was around my neck. Don't even try to tell me I don't need plan B.
Those motion detector trash cans don't work fast enough to catch puke.
She played chubby bunny with our cocks.. She got 4
She called herself a train and then took off all her clothing. I forget everything after that.
I saw you two flinging Jello at the sidewalk if that helps jog your memory.
we spent fifteen minutes trying to convince you that you weren't locked inside of your car
No, seriously, I've slept with 3 guys this month.
It's ok, February is a short month
He wants to tie me naked and spread out on his table, press a vibrator to my clit and feed me ice cream.
That is my stoner wet dream!
We got stoned and took selfies with the most perfect lawn
If you can't trust the person at the taco cabana drive thru, who can you trust?!
So much for no-infidelity-fridays....
The shrooms were awesome. Everyone's bones in their face looked so beautiful! Everyone had great face structures.
Are you really trying to argue your case that you seduced my cat?
hey im sorry i made fun of the color of your sheets, but like it was all i could focus on during sex because they were just THAT UGLY
he said he only had one rule...that he'd only go down on me 3x a day. so far this is turning into the best relationship ever.
Randomize
