I wish there was a Glade Plug-in for vaginas
new hobby: convincing random sorority girls around campus that we hooked up last weekend. i'm 2 for 5.
I want something that's relevant to him banging her right after I did. Like "runner-up"
just so you're aware of it in the morning: you tried to slide down the railing on a snuggie. twice.
it's been dubbed the summer of antibiotics
Her mom offered to give me a lap dance. I was a guest, I couldn't say no.
He wore nothing but a Speedo and a tie to the party. It was great. Everyone was looking at him like "this kid's the best"
apparently, dueling with garden tools in Home Depot is strictly frowned upon
That night just went downhill after you pissed yourself while sitting on my lap
Apparently while fucking a girl in the ass last night I cracked a molar, trying to find a dentist now.
Needless to say, she forgave him, they're back together, and I'm seriously considering having a lesbian year.
And I'm sorry for punching you in the face when I drunkenly threw my sandwich
How was the party
I came home with only one shoe, a t shirt tied around my shoeless foot and I was covered in motor oil. Oh and my shorts were inside out. So you tell me
sarahs drunk and is drawing dinosaurs all over the apartment. should i stop her?
whats she drawing them with?
eyeliner
no that's ok
You know he wants it bad when he starts going door to door for condoms.
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