it felt great physically, but AWFUL morally.
making cat noises will not fix the situation.
You coming out tonight? We gotta hang out before I move to Madison. BTW I'm moving to Madison.
i just realized why god gave us younger siblings....to DD for us when we come home for the summers
I fatbooth all their pics then decide which one is the cutest even if they gained like 400 lbs and then proceed to fuck him.
you're trying to get a guy who's been in a coma for 2 weeks and who thought he was in '08 yesterday to drive you to the liquor store?
yeah, you wanna come?
I always congratulate people on their vaginal emancipation.
Out of desperation, I used the leftover sauce from my goat masala as a mixer for vodka shots.
He wants to hookup..at the fair..this is our chance to leave him stranded with no clothes.
then looked at this little girl next to me and was like "don't drink when you get older and don't let your best friend be with assholes." she looked at me like i was crazy
There's nothing more rewarding than telling you that I fucked your dad
My vape juice got mixed up with the astroglide.
Wow..I bet that tasted bad.
Not tasted.
I just did my taxes to sober up, I'm THAT hungover
YOU UNCULTURED BADGER
This Cougar is looking at me like I’m a piece of meat and buying me top shelf cocktails
I’m getting a fear boner thinking about what she might do to me
Randomize
