? is bags or t-bags slang for scrotum?
jesus mom
If you're ever in Seattle we should Fuck. Or get coffee, whatever.
What drug did you take that made the cabinets scream at you?
New favorite sorority...they made me pancakes in the morning and welcomed back the walk of shame girls with a round of applause
i really care about you, respect you, another gay word, and another gay word... lets just drink
but im not going to tell the owner of the penis of my dreams how to wear his hair.
Sadly, she's the porn star that got away
I'm trying. I feel like we're trying to have sex with fruitcake. dry and boring.
She's passed out laying in the middle of the street. Cars are honking at her and going around her body. We need to stop playing BONECRUSHER.
In your alcohol circus, can my act be juggling men? Let's be real, I can juggle multiple dick buddies better than a professional
I wanna die. I can't recall the last time I was happy that doesn't involve your hand touching my butt.
THEY'RE TEXTING LIKE MIDDLE AGED SOCCER MOMS WHAT DO I DO
I puked in the back of my mom's new car because I had too much to drink at Chilis. I think I just hit rock bottom.
Go have a frustration cry and get over it
I thought I was at a rave until the paramedics started chasing me. You win again tequila.
Randomize
