What would you say if someone told you they liked your lips?
Which ones?
So i got in my car, the seats are leaned back, and soft soul music is playing. Wtf happened last night.
he said "you're pretty" then i made out with him. thats all it took
My gym is having a pizza and beer party. God im starting to love this place.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She just texted me that she's horny, then started quoted random music, then telling me everything she regrets. I don't think there's enough tequila in the world for me to deal with her...
The other night I NICELY told her she looked like Jack Sparrow
I HAVEN'T FUCKED ANYONE IN FOREVER AND A HALF I DON'T DESERVE TO BE A TRASHY BLONDE
Okay so for future reference and your own safety I should probably tell you that it is not cranberry juice in that bottle on the kitchen table.
Shoot me. Oh my god shoot me. My moms ex "likes assholes"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude, where are you?
In back
of car
... whose car?
He gives me the same feeling I get when someone puts a margarita or German chocolate cake in front of me
if i ever get to the point where i am moaning when i pee, please do the honorable thing and kill me.
There's a big ass bed, hella ecstasy, and I can guarantee you'll regret every second that you remember.
The neighborhood cougar just purred at me while I was doing yard work. I’m terrified and tumescent
Soon to be ex is nowhere to be found. Her attorney/new BF just showed up. 30 minutes late looking hungover. Pretty sure I'm getting the kids AND the house!
Randomize