I like you better when you drink
I like you better when I drink too
It was my birthday today and i decided that i am not checking my notifications on facebook so ill feel popular
Wrong number and your a loser
Take one last look at my face, because I'm drinking it off tonight.
There are rumors he has a square penis....ill do anything though....
u r missing out we r watching a tranny direct traffic in a gstring
It's official, the cities waste management does not recycle porn.
i was drunk enough to give the cab driver my number when he said "you talk like you like guys"
You screamed "I NEED TO GET THE WHOLE SET!" and then proceeded to try touching everyone's balls in the room
Just saw a guy I fucked in a clown suit in the bar. It's not Halloween. I have got to start making better life decisions.
Ok thats it i need a list. Full names, nicknames, in which frats, with a photo, of all the guys youve hooked up with because three of the same guys is ridiculous
I drank a girls breast milk at this wedding. Shit was next level
So somehow today's lecture on the immune system turned into me having to stand up and explain female ejaculation to the class.
Honestly I am too high to watch videos of you jerking off right now
This feels more like a conference of all the people I've fucked in the past year.
If he thinks I'm canceling my orgy to coddle his stupid fucking behavior, he has another thing coming
Randomize
