We're the kind of people who ruin family vacations
I feel so grown up. I just went to home depot to buy actual home improvement supplies instead of stuff to make a bong with.
i dont even feel safe using a push mower...that hungover
I have a feeling that watching gay porn with you was the reason I was dancing in a hurricane of floating dicks in my dream last night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He cut part of his finger off. It was a consolation blow job.
Because her vagina is one of those illusive black holes that leads to a parallel universe where he is king and the sea is made of beer! That is why they are together!
There is an alarming amount of urine in here.
he was having a black light party and drinking manischewitz wine out of a three foot tall trophy he stole from mcdonald's...that's when I decided it was time to leave
There is a chick wearing some guy's shirt wrapped around her waist as a skirt... She's flashing her panties to everyone as she sings karaoke. You need to get here.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's getting harder and harder to fake orgasms as I get older.
dude ur drinkin a beer not ta capri sun. lose the straw
The cop let us off with a warning because I had more Twitter followers than he did. The future is terrifying.
i tried to break up pigeon sex because one looked too young to consent. fireball feminism ftw
Like my mom really needs to know just how non existent my sex life is
I can’t tonight. I’ve got to see about a penis
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