Yeah I guess I was Pocahontus. If she were a trifling drunk who hung out in her undies, with possible brain damage.
Your sister got a Brazilian yesterday. It looks great
it's not cheating when I paid for it
But it was well worth it to see a man fly through the air in a beaver costume...
I have now slept with people from more countries than Ive actually visited. Can we make this a game somehow? Like foreign fuck buddy bingo?
Just a smidgen more estrogen and shed be golden
She's got a legit dose of dude going on
No kidding. All she needs is a cheek full of chewing tobacco and I'd have fucked John wayne.
He texted me saying that his mom found my nuva ring in their jacuzzi filter. I don't think I'm welcome back anytime soon.
Whenever I walk away from the group without saying anything, NEVER assume I'm just going to the bathroom.
It's like hey here is one penis enjoy nothing but that for the rest of your life
Reunion weekend was a success. Had 3 ex's inside my vag. Hat trick!
I was going to ask the people in the kitchen to keep the volume down, but they're cooking pasta at 3 AM and one complimented me on my polka-dot nightgown. They're high. No volume control.
When did i become the Rickety Cricket of my own life?
It's best not to have your booty call on social media. So if they post stupid shit, you still want to fuck them.
Not my lover. I would rather lose all my teeth, and I fucking love my teeth.
no offense but you looked like shit yesterday
tequila is unforgiving..
Randomize
