he was fingering me to the beat of a lady gaga song. new high? new low? i don know, but i came, so whatever.
I woke up this morning and was hoping we drank enough last night to have a unicorn drawn on my wrist. Good News: We did.
My Hamptons summer hookup resume reads like a walk-in clinic waiting list.
apparently i'm really good at getting wasted, having sex all night, getting multiple hickeys and oversleeping father's day brunch. this is the third year its happened.
I know i should have focused more on what you were saying in the text rather than the fact you spelt "suicidal" wrong
we are watching a video on ethics because somebody wrote "butt sex" on the attendance sign in sheet
Slurping strawberries throug a straw. It feels like the kool-aid man is coming in my mouth.
His penis has been a bonding mechanism beyond comparison.
We fucked to the rythmn of the thunder, it was magical
Porn. Physics. Porn. Icecream. Porn. That's my life now.
We can get high as fuck when there are no orders. If not its cool. I just figured Take Your Blunt Buddy To Work Day.
Sorry. My phone died in the middle of you explaining why we would never work as a couple. Whatever you were gonna say, I probably agree.
I don't trust his life but I trust his penis.
I did this clutch move yesterday at the bar where I grabbed a plastic cup for water and discreetly threw up in it while walking around and then tossed it. It was my best boot and rally ever
I put on a face mask and masturbated for an hour... my face now has a green tint
Randomize
