I just spent the night with a bunch of indian guys and i wasn't attracted to a single one. Yeah i've officially become an anti-indian indian.
I just applied for an unsubsidized loan naked. I love the internet.
just when i thought things couldnt get worse, the batteries died in my vibrator.
My hot female boss's cubical is right next to mine with a wall between us. Do you think it is too forward to make a glory hole in the wall?
finally nailed that neighbor chick. hopefully i can get her wireless password now. free internet trumps moral standards any day
I'd invite him but there's too many people who have fucked me going already
i found two dead squirrels on my front step this morning.. do you think they have something to do with my missing phone?
Theres a guy in your room wearing a franzi box costume and some girl is in the box giving him head.
I am currently explaining what double penetration is to the bridesmaid I hooked up with at my cousin's wedding. This is my life.
Sneezing blood is a good thing right? Medically speaking.
Yeah he got kind of mad when he found out he had chased his last two shots with a combination of orange soda, water, and used mouth wash.
I asked for a steak knife but the waitress could see in my eyes it was a bad idea
He sat next to me, put his arm around me, yelled at his girlfriend that he was breaking up with her, and told me I'm his little pet for the night.
He gave me an orgasim so fantastic that I had an asthma attack.
I'm going to smell of sex and shame.
How is that different than any other Monday night?
Randomize
