I wish Michael J Fox could read me bedtime stories
He could rock you to sleep
She passed out in my bed last night before anything happened. She felt really bad about that, so she gave me head when we woke up this morning.
Did I hear correctly when it sounded like he said "just don't let me throw up into your vaj?"
You cleaned out the gashes in your leg from hopping that fence with that whipped cream vodka, didnt you?
Quick question, when did I develop feelings, and how can I make them go away?
That's two questions.
He had a joint rolled for us when he picked me up. It's how ASU does romance
He told me his cum shot melted the paint on his bedroom wall and asked if I want to see it
Of the two of us, which one has licked a drag queen's tit in the past 5 days?
YOU KNOW BRAZILIAN BOYS ARE MY WEAKNESS
I spent the entire party sexting people's significant others for them because they were too drunk to do it themselves. I did quite well too. I should start a business
In order to save time, dignity and liver damage, wanna get naked?
Do you own a cuff key and know where Karen lives?
Found sauce from last night's pizza rolls wedged under my phone case... While sitting in my 8 am class. What happened last night?
All the doctor said was why
We will just distract him with tacos and porn.
Randomize
