Omg alex and i were cooking weiners on a campfire and a bear came and i am waayyy too high for this
I Just realized that having a picture folder that says "not for mom" may give off the wrong impression to wondering eyes
Sarah Palin is going to have a show on the discovery channel...Can I get a moment of silence for knowledge?
I'd suck anything for a pizza right now
Been considering the feasibility of adopting a kangaroo. Yes I'm very serious. And yes I'm very high.
Some chick just barfed in my math class. Everyone here is hungover. Yay community college
ALSO, bringing a stapler to the bar is a good idea
Im going to hell in a hand basket. With a ribbon tied to my head. I'll be like a puppy for the devil.
it went ok. then he slept in a parking lot and took me out for a picnic the next day. boys are confusing.
Lmao I should put that ad on Craigslist "in need of muscular and determined team of men to carry drunken birthday whore safely home"
I woke up with my wool blanket soaking wet on the dorm room floor, and my sweatshirt hanging on the shower door down the hall. So basically my camp-out-in-the-bathroom idea didn't turn out as planned
She said she wanted you to slurp her vagina like a spaghetti noodle.
Also, I found this app that is basically a tamagochi from the 90's and now I finally have something to keep me busy at work!
Just come here quick. I'm home in 3min. It will take you literally less than 5 to walk. Then 2 to undress, 16 to fuck, 2 to dress again and 5 to walk back..!!
exactly 16 eh??
My sister gave me satin sheets. We can fuck on satin sheets.
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