If you had to guess, would you say that as a species, midgets are more or less flammable than humans?
Less. Duh. They have less combustible mass.
When I saw him standing at full height, I realized exactly how much his body structure reminds me of his penis.
is it true you fucked a yoga instructor last night??! ..and let me know if you want me to post that question on your facebook so kelly can see how happy you are without her
If someone would have told me in preschool that I was going to do him I would have said no
Dude squirt doesnt even begin to describe it i thought she was the lost portal to atlantis with how much she let out
After some trial and error I found soaking my balls in maple syurip helps ease the pain.
Man I'll cab it I'll be sloshed by then. There's turtles involved
Only I could host a baby shower where the cops get called.
i hate going to her parties because i always know everyone there which means everyone knows my ex which means i wont get laid
And the sky opened up and god said.... "WET T-SHIRT CONTEST!!!!"
This is the beginning of the end. Testicle Tuesdays and free ball Friday are going to scar people for life
Dude that picute of your balls will haunt my nightmares
How the fuck did we end up at a strip club last night.. We started the night playing bingo at a church
I guess it's part of life. Sometimes your ex boyfriend becomes a drag queen.
Afterwards the first thing I said was, "You know, you're probably the first guy who has ever gotten laid wearing Star Wars pajama bottoms."
last night is slowly putting itself back together. Its one giant slutty puzzle, all the pieces are covered in tequila and shame.
Randomize
