i justawanted to let you know that illi aalways be thwew for ui and o qill waasag youer dog whenebvet u wsnt
I tried making the sex a little better this time so right before I blew I yelled "ready or not here I come!"
Want any specific kind of beer?
Yeah. Alcohol flavor.
Got it. Anything but Miller.
I don't know what happened last night but I woke up this morning with "wolf pack" tattooed on my knuckles.
Two girls I have never met just thumb wrestled to decide who gets to make out with me.
Lil wasted at a baby shower. Here's to beating teen pregnancy BOTTOMS UP
she trying to cartwheel up the stairs... not going so well
That's because "bed time" is my sex playlist. If you're trying to fall asleep use "nap time"
I'm watching intervention which is getting me psyched for your birthday. Is that wrong?
I whispered "you're doing a great Job" when he was fucking me. Then high fived him.
I think it's gonna be hard to find a guy that won't take my consistent drinking as alcoholism
It feels like the devil is humping my brain with his razor sharp erection.
fyi, pepper spray hurts. whoever comes up with the best backstory wins a prize.
Nothing warms my heart more than the sight of a naked hockey player in my bed.
Drunk text the hot guy two doors down confessing my love for him.... He gave me a thank you card today.
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