I'm watching harry potter...good thing I already know I'm gay
Rescue me. My white trash great uncle just pulled out his belly at the restaurant to show us how big this woman's tit was
i would give spencer pratt a bj just so i could bite his dick off
he'd just find a way to get more famous from being a eunich.
My 3rd grade teacher, who was also my fav, thought i was in prison. That seriously upsets me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she asked if she could keep her bee antennas on during her mugshot. i love halloween.
We learned about herpes today in bio. I might as well have given the lecture
Just hit on a fat chick so shed buy me a drink. Then i walked away. Nice to see how the other half lives.
Hey. I can't work your space dryer so I'm wearing your blanket home. I'll get my clothes later. Fun party!
I always thought The Big Bang Theory wasa terrible show but that was before it came with blowjobs and pizza.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I woke up to some strange woman rubbing peanut butter on my thighs
In hindsight, I probably should not have let the waiter give me a chiropractic adjustment on my neck last night.
Just took acid. Wish me luck.
I worked out twice today and you're dropping acid. My life sucks.
Do you feel better now that you've sent me a picture of your dick?
Yep.
His family, without saying anything, started a game of quarters the moment the drinks arrived. I love them. If only I didn't hate him so much.
I'm not going to drink anymore, and on that note I'm not going to drink any less either, so I'll see you there. . .
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