Come to wood. Julia is putting pants on. We must stop her.
I just saw a woman parallel park a horse. Awesome. Only in New York..
i was out of cigarettes so i took the butts out of the ashtray, emptied them out, and proceeded to roll one big Frankenstein cigarette.
I might scale it back and go as an investment banker. Which is the exact same costume as James Bond on LSD. I just introduce myself differently.
yeah a little bit of me felt bad about it. But the rest of me was having sex with him.
He deleted all his profile pics with her. It was like the bat signal for single women everywhere.
Of course he did. He is like the oprah winfrey for vaginas. Always giving that shit away.
I love you like a cupcake loves an overweight child, very similar to the mannerisms of a whole cake but personal, and minus the commitment issues, plus just the right amount of icing; not to mention the convenience of mobility, and only a smidgen of the guilt😘
He is nice. Kind of short though. But didn't try to rub his jean cock on me.
Which I appreciated.
you just cant say you love him and then say you want to fuck your boss
Note to self; if you can light it on fire, you probs shouldn't drink it
Btw I have come to the conclusion that we really need to do it in a bed. Like at least once..
I don't think tits should taste like fish.
Every time Brady gets sacked I cum a little...
i just sexted for my mom while she was driving, i have hit an all time low.
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