Are u religion class? I'm on my way, I have cum in my hair. tell u later.
I just saw grafitti that read "Mug The Fart Eater". Really, Memphis? That's all you've got?
May or may not have just drunkenly opened my christmas presents. Greatly disappointed. Might break up sooner.
i want you to know that after i type the word "your" , vagina is next on my auto correct text
I don`t remember Saturday, actually
Its ok, i dont remember 2007
At 4am he sent "uree asss ize anmazin"
Found a beard hair in my crotch.... care to explain?
I just found like 5 packs of sparklers. If someone doesn't get set on fire tonight I am retiring from party hosting.
guy just got out of the car at the drive in and told his girlfriend "fuck you and your taco" and walked off
Now that I'm hitting my bong, I realized I haven't missed something so much in a long time. I love Thomas the Dank Engine.
Watched an eagle swoop down and eat a rabbit on my walk back from your place, literally too high to handle this right now
If I send you a picture of a dick will you give me your honest reaction?
Tackling and headbutting friends, running away and hiding from everyone, attempting to streak across campus, and then waking up with no sign of a hangover... happy 21 to me
He's a snuggler. Every time I attempt to make a move to find my bra he reigns me in. Needless to say i could be here a while.
I’m going to hump him until his teeth hurt and then I’m going to have my way with him
Randomize
