Solid performance last night. Wanna be fuck buddies?
To answer your question of whether I "went back," tits just informed me I was kicked out for falling off my barstool and passing out on the floor...
Wow, you were right... Weed does start conversations
BEES IN MY FUCKING PANTS. HELP.
i could't wear that belt anymore, it was gonna make me keep shitting for the rest of the night
He managed to get his pants on, so the cop just sat there facing us with his lights shining in the car. I made shadow puppets.
This lumberjack with a huge beard is doing his group presentation in a dirty t shirt that says "I'm only 2 girls short of a threesome"
No hurry on coming over. My body currently wants everything on the inside to be on the outside. But really. Don't hurry.
She was rubbing her face on the carpet, she was high.
Heat not working dressed like an eskimo. A real one with a ski sock on my junk
I worked all year for this tax return. I deserve to get my nipples pierced.
Did I let your boyfriend smear a banana into my face last night? Because I have pictures that are telling me I did....
All boys are excommunicated from my vagina until further notice.
I just bought sparkling water with plan B. I am the most basic bitch to ever exist.
You know that we wouldn’t even be talking about all this if you would have kept your candy consumption judgement comments to yourself.
Randomize
