o shit let me call u back theres a hamburger in my pocket
Spencer Pratt, I WILL beat the shit out of you someday, I Promise
these two guys are about to go shot for shot with syrup
now he is talking to a potato
Did we use protection last night?
Um, no...keep in touch, okay?
then they high fived as they party boyed me. I was a policewoman sandwhich. I love you halloween.
Come over and help me clean up your so-called "winter wonderland" that you made with the fire extinguisher in the kitchen last night.
She compares her life to Teen Mom. She's 28.
There was a stripper pole on the party bus. Was being past tense because some fat chick somehow tore it from the ceiling while grinding
Apparently it is frowned upon to ask the bouncer to stop pointing his flashlight in your face and step back so you can puke....and then do it
Jesus, you make out with one twin then sleep with the other and suddenly they don't want to play soccer with you... So sensitive...
The three yr old girl I nanny grabbed a pole just now and is chanting "this is my house"
Sounds like you at that dive bar last weekend
I want to get up and tell you that smells delicious but I'm struggling with the idea of pants
Once you jizz in someones hat, you cant take it back.
Dude at one point I lost you only to find you sitting in the bushes eating pizza.
This is your post bachelor party survival text. This a free and complementary service to make sure you are still alive. For alive, say yes. For hurting, say ugh. If lost, say help. If dead, please feel free to not respond. Thank you and we hope you enjoyed the party.
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