Plan B is the new Plan A
My brain says no but my pants say off.
whatever. i fb stalked him and his pic comments are witty. so i'm going for it.
just threw the rents a curveball by making french toast and bacon when i came home sober. good luck tellin when im high/drunk now.
I have new birth control, three bottles of jack, and some coupons for micky d's. You wanna have that sleepover?
Her brother walked in on her giving me a bj and just laughed. I got a highfive before I left.
thats what you get for writing a paper after liquor pitchers
its only a rough draft.
i jsut feel off the bus, but its ok the driver let me back on. a woman hid her baby from me..
That is correct. I did in fact somehow pass out in the tanning booth for over an hour. And yes the attendant did have to open it up and shake me awake.
So we became Pizza Strippers- we stripped and asked for slices of pizza in return.
Is it a coincidence that the reminder on my phone to take my birth control is "I'm ready to party" from Bridesmaids?
I WAS KIDDING ABOUT SLUTEMBER BUT ITS ACTUALLY HAPPENING
She's really sweet and cute, but when she drinks, she becomes way too proud of her bush.
These last 48 hours have just been about deleting my most recent snap story
Company meeting and there he was. Felt a little weird like 'last night you were telling me how your dick loves me, and now we're listening to a report on sales figures'.
Randomize
