It was like doing yoga with his dick in me
i just woke up in the hallway. not my hallway. i officially raise my hand to be DD next week.
she sang that "this little piggy song" to my balls. and somehow made it work, with me only having two balls instead of five.
There is a half eaten corn dog and soy sauce on the counter... WTF did you eat last night??
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If I die and they 'assume' it's natural causes, just go with it.
While you were puking in the ocean I was rubbing your back saying "Just give it back to Mother Earth".
All I know is that it's pretty damn mean to put a glass wall in a bar.
My building was evacuated who wants to quake and bake
Sex on roller skates
Floating mattress
Tie
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I could not actually bring myself to utter the phrase "donkey cock" in front of my father. Not possible.
The best of us have puked in our office garbage cans. I just hope yours wasn't the metal mesh kind...and bagless like mine. Rock n roll office manager.
I just did the walk of shame in monkey slippers in the snow
Teach me the song of your people
She's licking the whiskey out of the carpet. I think we may be soulmates.
I came so hard my entire leg seized. Her blowjob gave me a Charlie horse.
woke up. showered n got ready. had sex. and was still 15 minutes early to work... its gonna be a good day!
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