New boss looks like john cusack in a collar. Hot. Why do i always want to have sex with priests?
she wrote "SORRY" in her vomit and left
It's sad because pictures are supposed to say a thousand words, and theirs just say 'fat'
Everything gets a little fuzzy after the flats of jello shots, but I do have a vague recollection of being at the top of a large human pyramid
Softest bathroom rug I've slept on in my life, there have been many
That doesn't mean I'm a slut. Unless McFlurries are involved.
I will rub McFlurries all over you.
I think that means you're growing up...when your coke nail becomes your opening mail nail.
What was the point of renting a $600 trolley if no one even remembers going to the first bar?
Wedding party came into the bar an hour ago. Mother of the bride is a stage five clinger. send help.
Well the streak is over, I saw a penis today
Your dick is the only reason I have motivation to come back to school today
Also either i just launched into space as a rocket or my legs just orgasmed, but i am high as a soul train
DID YOU OR DID YOU NOT, PEE IN MY FUCKING TRASHCAN?!
I just had a morning three-some with marijuana and a detachable shower-head
I see more hoeing in ur future
Randomize
