You and your empty threats of no sex. Like.u.cud.hold.out.
Is it weird that I think of Ennis from Brokeback Mountain everytime I hear "Make em Say" by Master P? "I don't need your money. Huh." NA NA NA NAAA.
I spent my night drunkenly staring at a picture of John Stamos. How do you think I feel?
just peed on my foot to get a spider off. that lazy.
i just saw some one pass a baby through the drive-thru window at dairy queen.
Great I'll forever be branded as gym slut at the new gym.
If you feel like laying around and watching a movie, that's where I'll be for the next several hours not moving, blaming others, and generally feeling sorry for myself.
It's only Tuesday and I just measured and checked to see if my 6'5 Friday booty call will fit in the back of my jeep comfortably.
And I was like "take off the damn flower crown, we're about to have sex not post an indie picture on tumblr"
why not an indie porn pic then
Hungover on St. Patrick's Day. I did this backwards.
I got arrested FOR running from the cops. In college Dad got arrested and THEN ran from the cops. So it could be worse.
We are back but we are listening to stairway to heaven in my car. Amy is air drums. Be back when it's over.
you woke up this morning in a laundry basket, only wearing rainboots.
Mid thrust, say hold on I need a pic for my friend.
His dick smelled like strawberries...it was awesome.
Randomize
