So I'm stoned for 420, and have an eye doctor appointment in fifteen minutes
Are your eyes okay
I mean if I was Asian they would be
She said I was really immature but whatever...oh by the way we just bought a toilet and turned it into a beer bong so come over
I have got to lose weight!! Apparently no one wants to fuck a fat chick with herpes.
You have problems? I'm 20 years old and i'm balding
My corndog is like a popsicle of bread. A WHOLE. POPSICLE. OF BREAD.
Yeah he gave the rest of the brownies to the bouncer that took his fake
I know it was you that I fucked last night... I can smell my disappointment all over the sheets
I have a king size bed, I guarantee multiple orgasms, and I'll give you a ride home in the morning. Respond quickly.
You gotta hand it to him. 6 hours in a new town and he's already fuck someone, had his ass kick by her bf, and rounded up a posse of people to kick this guys ass.
Just specific performance'd my way into her pants. I literally said specific performance and that shit worked. Thanks B. Law!
she's fucked both of my roommates but not me. i feel like I'm not part of the group anymore
the good news is that even if it's Alex's, I can still say it's Colin's, because the kid will come out ginger anyway!
who knew there'd be a plus side to your ginger fetish one day?
Can you send me the pictures of me riding the penis
I shaved my entire vagina for a man who had the personality of a potato and a C- orgasm. Life is a series of disappointments.
Ah Christ I think I've reached the single life mentality 100%. I just inquired a photographer about a photo shoot with my dog.
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